Vauxhall launches new taxi.


For many years now, after a good night out, it’s almost been mandatory to get your taxi driver to stop off at the local kebab house for a quick doner. Now, thanks to Vauxhall’s ingenious new Taxi Kebabi, having your kebab and getting home are no longer a problem.

Based upon the 9-seat Combi model, this class-defining Vivaro features two gas-fired spit rotisserie grills, salad bowls integrated into the arm rests, chilli dispensers and of course a tasty selection of sauces.

Taxi driver Justin Trafik said: “The vinyl seats and floor covering will prove a real boon for the occasional spillage.”

Trafik’s colleague Jason Donervan was in perfect harmony: “With Vivaro’s class-leading whole life costs, this incredible vehicle offers us hard-pushed drivers another valuable revenue stream that could ultimately see taxi fares being slashed.”

On a more sombre note, Pieter Bred, the UK spokesman for Britain’s High Street Kebab Association, said: “Without making a meal of this, the Vauxhall Taxi Kebabi could spell the end for high street kebab houses.”

Vauxhall spokesperson April Fulls had the final word: “With the launch of the Vivaro Taxi Kebabi, we really believe we’ve given our customers something to sink their teeth into.”

Christopher Macgowan


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